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Milo The Dog Graciously Donates His Poop To The Cause Of Archeological Research

Millions of years from now, archaeologists, perhaps from another planet, will be carefully digging through previously inhabited areas of Earth. They will be looking for artifacts to help them understand the nature of the human experience. During this process, they will discover thousands of little plastic bags containing organic matter. They will wonder to themselves, “What was it about these little bags that was so important to humankind?”

What Milo Will Contribute To The Future

I was thinking about all this last weekend when I was out walking Milo the Dog. As I pulled out a bag to collect his most recent achievement, I wondered what an alien archaeologist might make out of all of this millions of years from now. 

Three possibilities came to mind:


1. Perhaps these were snack bags. We might have enjoyed snacking on whatever these little bags contained. In fact, we might have found this snack so tasty that we were addicted to it, and we carried it wherever we went.

2. Perhaps these little bags had a deep religious meaning. We were emotionally attached to them. They helped us form a closer connection to our creator.  

3. Perhaps the contents of these bags had an intrinsic value, like gold or silver.  

Of course, with each of these possibilities, the alien archaeologists would be confused over why we kept tossing them in the dump.

By the time these archaeologically significant little bags are discovered, there is a good chance that they will be fossilized.  

I have several fossils displayed in my office. My wife brought them back from South Dakota. My clients often admire them and make positive comments.  

So, as I watched Milo drop another gem onto a neighbor’s manicured yard, I had to wonder. Will this one-day be displayed in some alien archaeologist’s office? If so, I hope that visitors will admire it and make positive comments.

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About The Author
Jack Edwards
Jack Edwards
Jack Edwards is my pen name. I post my humor columns on my website: I describe myself as, “Just like Dave Barry, but sadly, not as funny.” Please consider subscribing. It’s fun, free and family friendly.
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