Friendships are what get a lot of us through life. On TV, in movies, and on the Net, friendship is exalted and even elevated to the level of one’s “tribe.” But in real life, people can betray confidences, fail to come through when they’re needed most, turn into bores, or are more work than they’re worth. When our relationships with others are fulfilling, there’s nothing better. But when we see or
Never was the saying Silence is Golden more applicable than in a happy marriage. Otherwise, husbands, if you talk and your wife doesn’t respond, you’re ticked off. If she responds and it’s not what you want to hear, you’re ticked off. If you just want to vent and she’s determined to solve your problem, you’re ticked off. But if there is no talk, you can both fantasize about the great conversation
Although we’ve come a long way from thinking the only real man is a Marlboro Man, many in our generation still have trouble embracing the full spectrum of manhood. Therein lies the rub between many fathers and sons. Fathers of grown offspring have to deal with leftover cultural stereotypes, boundary issues—if a son is named “Junior,” isn’t he supposed to be a mini-me?—and sometimes plain and simpl
I was never one to hold a grudge. In fact, that old axiom, “Never go to bed on an argument,” didn’t hold water for me. I thought I should always go to bed on an argument because by morning I’d forgotten what I fought with my husband about and therefore didn’t need to make up with him. He, on the other hand, has always been a world-class grudge holder. The Dodgers left Brooklyn in 1957 when my husb
There’s always an “aha!” moment when people realize they’ve moved up into the next age bracket. For some it’s qualifying for a senior discount at the movies. For others it’s perusing the 55+ menu at Denny’s. For still others it’s being called “Mr.” or “Mrs.,” to which many reply in indignation, “Call me Stan. Mr. Whitaker is my father.” For me it was initially the announcement during a heat wave t
There always comes a moment in the new year when I survey my retired husband’s closet. This exercise leads to THE DISCUSSION, and, no, it’s not about whether he should be buried or cremated, but whether it’s time to go clothes shopping. Believe me, this is the more fraught topic. Me: “Let’s go through your closet first so you can see what you need.”” He, alarmed: “I can’t do that! Real men don’t g
I am a big believer in the psychic and physical benefits of cuddling. In fact, I feel a hug a day probably does a person more good than a whole bushelful of apples. The problem is how to effectuate said hug when you’re of a certain age. Far removed from the days of heedless and spontaneous frisky business, we now need a strategy to get it on. When I’m lying on the couch and my husband is sitting i
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