The day comes, seemingly out of nowhere, when your wife or girlfriend says, “Honey, I want to get a boob job.” If this is the first you’ve heard of it, it may freak you out a bit. Perhaps she has hinted over the years that she wanted to fix her breasts, but you thought she was kidding. Yes, it is common for women in their 40s and 50s to just decide they want to explore the possibilities. So now what?
There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to choosing to have a cosmetic procedure. It’s a very personal decision and should not be taken lightly. How you communicate with her about the decision can make all the difference, so you guys need to be mindful of your approach. Whatever you do, don’t say something like “Thank God! I was hoping you would fix those pancakes.”
Understand that the term boob job doesn’t necessarily have to mean getting “Baywatch” melons, but it might! Whether she wants a breast lift to treat her droopy breasts, or a breast augmentation to restore or enhance breast volume, or both, there are many options that are available.
The most common reaction I hear from men is: “Why would she want to do this? I love her the way she is! Does she want to attract other men?” I can assure you, in my 30 years of experience, 99% of women want breast surgery to feel better about themselves, to feel better in nice clothes, and to regain confidence. Rarely does it have anything to do directly with you.
Consider these reasons. She carried your babies and they sucked the life out of her, and her breasts! Or perhaps it’s something that she has always wanted to do but felt it was too selfish earlier in life. Have an honest conversation with her about her motivations and try to be supportive if it is a reasonable request.
I typically see a few types of men involved with the consultation process:
A confident man, brimming with excitement at the prospect of a perkier, sexier, more confident partner. These men tend to ask some questions, promise to be a good caretaker, and let the woman take control of what size and shape she wants to be.
A nervous, unsure man, who attends her appointments but hardly says a thing. He is there for her physically, but emotionally he is frightened out of his mind that his wife is going to become a different person. He doesn’t want her to get it done because he feels threatened. In most of these cases, I can assure him he has nothing to worry about!
Lastly, and don’t be this guy, the total dick that wants to control all the decisions. This guy holds the purse strings, so he expects her to get a DDD cup. Even if you are paying for it, please let the woman decide what is best for her. She is the one who will be living with her new shape every day.
Breast surgery is not for everyone, and it comes with its own set of risks. If she is serious about it, get involved and support her. Help her get all the facts to make a wise decision. You will reap the benefits too.